Please stop feeding our kids sugar.

Let's start by establishing that I am not a candy-hating witch.

I eat chocolate every single day. I'm not exaggerating there. Some days that small chocolate square is the only thing that keeps me sane. Yesterday I ate a baseball size serving of Swedish Fish because I have no willpower. I love candy. I am also a mom trying to feed my children healthy food, and I am making this request on behalf of moms like me: Please STOP feeding our kids sugar.

The AHA recommends that children ages 4-8 eat no more than 130 calories from sugar per day. That's the same as 3 teaspoons or 12.5 grams of sugar. Studies suggest that the average kid actually eats around 21 teaspoons per day.

I want you to stop for a moment and image a child you know eating 21 teaspoons of sugar.

We've all heard the facts. Anything processed or packaged in any way usually has added sugar. The Cheerios my kids eat for breakfast have 1g. The "healthy" greek yogurt has 13g. A Capri Sun drink pouch also has 13g- that's all their recommended sugar in one little pouch. I can't speak for other kids, but mine don't consider yogurt or a drink pouch their treat for the day.

Treats are everywhere in a child's world. Restaurants and offices have bowls of suckers. The grocery pick-up place gives out fruit snacks. I ration Halloween candy to one per day. I threw out the remaining Halloween candy the day before Valentine's Day. The candy stashes were restocked from the class parties. On St. Patty's day there is now a leprechaun that brings treats to school. Last year our kids were really confused why he didn't come to our house too. I could keep going...

I feel like I am fighting against a constant bombardment of sugary junk food, and I am always losing.

The actual candy situation at our house right now. I guess I missed some Halloween candy.

Just as an example, last Sunday my own children found fruit snacks and powdered sugar doughnuts at church, they ate pancakes for brunch, had a sucker from some errand I don't even remember, and then asked for some of their Valentine's Day candy in the afternoon.

What all of these statistics and anecdotes mean is that whether you are a teacher, a babysitter, a grandparent or just some well-meaning stranger at a football game, by the time you see our kids they have already FAR exceeded their 3 teaspoons of sugar for the day. That "one little treat" that you rationalize won't hurt at all is adding to the extra 18 teaspoons of sugar every day.

We are beyond thankful for all of the people who help us care for our children and want to spoil them with treats, but therein lies the problem: Everyone wants to spoil them with treats.

Maybe even more important, I would like to spoil my children sometimes. I love taking them for ice cream or giving them a treat once in a while. But every time I do I think of the fact that they already got all of their allotted sugar for the day just from their regular food. I read the articles that say sugar, not fat, may be the #1 cause of heart disease. Processed sugar intake has been linked to cancer. I'm not worried about ruining their dinner, I'm worried about not killing them.

I say "no" to treats more times in a day than I can count. I don't like that. I want to be the fun mom who says "Here, eat a Starburst." But when three other people have already fed my kids treats that day, I'm stuck being the witch.

Please don't make me be the candy-hating witch.

A Love Letter to the Husband That Doesn't Buy Me Flowers

My Dear Husband,

You do not buy me flowers very often.

You also tend to claim, often at the wrong times, that we don't celebrate Valentine's Day because "Every day is like Valentine's Day around here." That's one of the reasons I love you: Your snarky sense of humor.

Back to the flowers. Maybe it's because back in my college feminist days I said "I don't need a man to buy me flowers." Or maybe when I told you that cut flowers are REALLY bad for the environment you took me REALLY seriously. I used to get a little upset by the no-flower thing, this past year has put that in perspective.

We were babies!

Almost 14 years of marriage had already solidified for me that, in fact, I do not need a man to buy me flowers. What I need is a man to pick up the slack when I'm sick in bed for a week. That's you. I need a man to bounce ideas off of when I can't decide if I'm all worked up over nothing or something huge. You are great at that too. And yes, my feminist side points out that I don't actually need a man for those things, But I am really glad it's you, anyway.

You are still my #1 partner for new
adventures!

Seven months ago, when I told my friends that we were moving, one of them replied "You must really love your husband to quit your job and follow him to Arkansas!" I still laugh at humor and truth of this statement, but now I know for sure that I would follow you anywhere.

If you came home tomorrow and said "I took a job in Northern Saskatchewan." I would first say "What the hell is wrong with you?!?" but then I would follow you there. Because at the end of every day I am excited for you to come home. When something good happens you are the first person I want to tell. When something bad happens, you are quick to tell me "We will get through this together." You are there every time I, or our daughters, need you. What's more, you seem to enjoy being with us more than anything else, and that means a lot to me.

Don't go getting a big head now, because we all know nobody is perfect (and by that I specifically mean that YOU are not perfect) but you do a pretty amazing job of never letting me down when it matters.

You have said to me so often in these last months "I dragged you across the country. You should do what makes you happy." even though we both know you didn't have too much of a choice either. The grace and command with which you have handled our past year makes me feel far more appreciated than flowers ever could. I'm proud of the team we make together and I am thankful every day that our girls are growing up with you as a role model.

Te amo

P.S.- I worried this was too mushy to share with the Internet, but don't worry, no one really reads my blog anyway.